Unofficial Retirement Community

Welp, funny story happened tonight. Some background info about our neighborhood first- 1. We are the youngest ones here by at least 40 years. 2- The only neighbors that don't frown on young *kids* "running down the neighborhood" are the ones across the street. They are awesome, we love them to death. 3- Our HOA fees are RIDICULOUS (we live in a no-maintenance neighborhood), and they HOA president takes her position VERY seriously. Think Mrs. McClusky on Desperate Housewives times three. We pretty much live in an unofficial retirement community.

Sooooooo... After my late spin class I came home and I was still feeling good, so I asked the fam if they wanted to walk Macy-our dear Golden Retriever- to the end of our block (where there is a small field of grass) to throw her ball and let her "potty" before bed. Our backyard is pretty much all concrete, so we usually take her down there or on a walk a couple times a day. So hubbs, baby, and I were meandering and telling old war stories (apparently a friend of a friend of hubbs is stationed in North Korea), when Macy took off running way ahead of us and would not for any reason return to our side. Our little neighborhood has barely any traffic, so we were ok with that. UNTIL I noticed the HOA president's garage door open. With her standing outside eyeing our little furry angel up with her arms crossed. I quickly racked my brain to think of how many HOA "laws" we were breaking. Dog off leash/not curbing dog? Noise violation from yelling at her? I didn't know, but I was freaking out internally. As we got closer to her (and Macy, who was now sniffing around in the yard to her right), and yelled a super friendly "hello, how are you?!" And immediately regretted it's cheesiness. Now she KNOWS that I know that she knows that we are doing something wrong, I'm sure of it!

Her: The guy next to me has been complaining about a dog pooping in his yard.
Me: Ummm, that can't be ours, we always bring a bag [held up plastic bag]

I look over, and there our big blonde beauty is taking a massive dump...... AWKWARD! I can't tell at this point if our dear ole HOA prez's view is compromised by trees dividing her and the neighbor's lawn. I don't think I have ever picked up a steaming hot pile of crap so fast. Nor do I even intend to again.

Her: Did she just go?
Me: Ummmm...
Her: Where did she just go?
Hubbs: [Starts laughing hysterically] What are the odds of that? That's pretty funny.

So what can we do now, but hold our heads up high (and bag of crap down low) and keep walking? "Have a great evening!" I yell, then add a nervous snicker. --No response--

So of course I immediately tell hubbs about all the things I SHOULD have said and the things I would say if I ever got a chance at her again, accusing our dog of poo'ing and us not picking it up! Any you know what he tells me? He tells me that there may have been a SLIGHT chance that he didn't pick up her pile last time he took her down there alone. He made an easy mistake of forgetting a bag. Embarrassing! No wonder people hate us here! So on the way back to our own house I peer into the man's yard who has been complaining about "piles", the same yard our dog violated ten minutes prior. And, yep, an identical pile (minus the steaminess) to the one that Macy left earlier. More poo was added to the already heavy bag.

Ugh, I hate it when other people are right and there's nothing I can say to them in my head to belittle them!